I just saw a blog post asking What happened in your mother’s life when she was exactly the age you are now? And I thought, "Hrmm, I wonder..." and so here I am going to guess at what might have happend to my mom on March 1, 1986 (the internet is great for date math).

It is hard to really know what might have been going on with my mom that day. I know she lived in Utica, NY back then (it had been a year or so since she and my dad had gotten divorced) and she lived in a tiny little apartment and she might have had her rabbit Ralph by then as well. March 1, 1986 was a Saturday so I know she wasn't at work. She actually worked on the air force base my dad was at I think, but she worked with the air traffic controllers. I figure on a Saturday she was probably running errands in her little red Ford Escort; not quite the little red sports car she dreamed of but it was, at least, a little red car. Had she gotten the Ford Escort GT she could have at least lied to herself and called it a sports car.

Had it been 1985 and not 1986 on that particular weekend she might have even had my older brother and I over to visit. We lived with our dad after the divorce so we visited mom on weekends and for a longer period (2 weeks I think) in the summer. Once we moved out of the state (to Ohio) our visits were limited to the summer which was vastly more manageable; but I imagine difficult for her. I think the perspective is a lot different from parent to child than it is from child to parent. When I was a kid I don't remember ever experiencing home-sickness. For instance the summer after the divorce I stayed in Dracut, Massachusetts with my Aunt Linda. I didn't really think about my parents much. I suppose some might call that selfish but I always though of it as independent. My mother, on the other hand probably thought about Ted and I. I know now that I have kids it would be much harder on me to be separated from them all year but 2 weeks that it was vice versa.

Since we weren't visiting that weekend she might have been getting her hair cut off. Well, not entirely off but pretty darn short. At some point after they split up mom started to get her hair cut really short. In fact, the first time she got it cut that short I didn't recognize her. She had to come to my school to get me, I was in trouble for something, and as I was walking down the hall to the principals office I walked right past her. Let me tell you - that didn't go over well at all. It was strange though considering, before that, she always had a huge head of curly hair which was suddenly basically shaved with clippers on the side and was kind of poofy on the top. She must have lost 20 pounds in hair with her new coiffure. It wasn't my fault!

By this point in my mom's post divorce life she might have even been in a serious relationship with a guy named John (whom she later married; maybe later that year - I don't remember) he was an air traffic controller she had met at work. Thus, she might have been out doing stuff with him over the course of that Saturday. Maybe ice skating or catching a movie or whatever it is folks in their mid thirties do while dating. Maybe they where just sitting around chatting and getting to know each other better; though I'd like to hope they were out taking advantage of a nice cool crisp day in upstate New York.

Overall, I would imagine she was, just like the original posters mom, just living life. Her life was quite a bit different than mine at that point and I would guess a bit more difficult - but she was making progress towards an entirely new lifestyle from what she had spent most of her adult life living. I doubt if she remembers that day specifically but I imagine she will post some sort of comment here letting me know how bad my memory is before too long.

#Family #MyLife